Those Games We Use to Play?
by CaliTues
Summary: "Well…we use to play in the…closet…" He quickly regretted saying that. She smirked and jerked her head to the closet. "Wanna play Roxie?" Current: Truth or Dare! Multichaptered Oneshots. Involving Kairi and Roxas playing games of all sorts. Hey guys I'm baaack c;
1. Closet Time

**Roxiri is awesome. Enough said. Anywho. I suppose, I wrote this in response to a friend's oneshot, ****The Great Oreo ****Massacre**** of '09. Awesome. Go read and review it. Now. **

**For EternalSnowxxx**

Roxas frowned as he watched the redhead dig through her closet. He sighed looking around the pink room, finding nothing interesting that caught his eye, besides Kairi herself; this was starting out to be a very, very boring day indeed. She had called him, at seven in the morning, on a wonderful raining Saturday, when he could be peacefully sleeping, to get to her house, as quickly as possible. She hadn't told him why, just that it was important, that he was there by fifteen after. So he had been forced out of the warm comforts of his bed, and cast out into the cold rain, to walk the three blocks to her house.

He fell backwards and lay across her bed, letting his feet dangle off the edge. He began to count all the darts that were scattered across the ceiling when Kairi let out an exasperated scream. He shot up to see her frowning with her arms crossed, glaring at her closet.

"Roxas!" He quickly slid of the bed and got to his hands and knees beside her as he looked with uncertainty at the massive mess of clothes, empty cans of Mountain Dew, and empty packages of Oreos. He arched a brow at the mess and then looked at Kairi to see her glaring at him.

"What!?"

"Okay, when we were little, do you remember what we use to play?"

"Uh…" He looked to the closet, trying to make the connection.

"Do you!?" She cried.

"No!" _Jeez, somebody didn't sleep last night. _"You tried to make me play Barbie with you. And when I said no, you cried and told my mom."

"Can it, man whore." She threw an empty can at him, which hit him on the forehead.

"Dammit Kairi!"

"What else did we play?"

"Uh…" Roxas raked his memories trying to remember what he and Kairi had occupied their childhood with.

"Well?" He glared at her impatience. He honestly had no idea how he put up with her constant mood swings of late.

"Well…we use to play in the…closet…" He quickly regretted saying that.

She smirked and jerked her head to the closet. "Wanna play Roxie?"

"Uh…I…we, I mean," He stammered, his face quickly heating up.

"Ohmigod Roxas!" She laughed. "You thought I was serious!? Pervert!"

He frowned and wrapped an arm around her neck, holding her in a headlock.

"You remember this game Kai?" He grinned as she struggled.

"Let go or I swear, I will, bite you." He scoffed and began ruffling her hair making her scream bloody murder. It wasn't ten seconds after he dare touch her precious hair before she sunk her teeth into his arm.

"What the hell!?" He pushed her off of him and cradled his arm. "You're a beast!"

"And you, are an ass-hole." She said with a cocky smile.

"Aha, I do remember what we played, or what the rest of us played." He said with a smirk.

The smile fell from her face and she gave him a confused look. "What do you mean?"

"You know, we would all play those imaginary games, pirates, or knights? And we never let you play." He laughed and turned away from her to look into the closet. "Probably because you were a sadistic bitch even at the innocent age of five."

Kairi listened with her mouth open slightly, taking it all in. She bit her lip and then sat on her bed.

Roxas stood facing away from her, waiting for her to make a sarcastic comeback, but instead heard only her crying. He turned around on his heel to see, she was indeed crying.

"Kairi, I wasn't se-"

"Was that why?" She cut him off, and looked up at him, "They, really did hate me, even then?"

Roxas bit the inside of his cheek, so she did know that Hayner and Pence had something against her? They had only been jealous that he had rather hung out with Kairi than them, and it had always been that way. Even now.

"I was kidding, you're not a bitch." He sat on the bed beside her, "and if you were, it'd be okay, because you'd be my bitch." He grinned.

Kairi rolled her eyes and turned to glare at him. "You still haven't told me."

"Huh?" He tried to play it off, because he really had no idea what game they use to play, besides the …

"What did we play?"

Roxas swallowed and looked to the closet. He stood and walked over to the messy closet, and began digging through the junk like she had earlier, before pulling out a wooden box and held it up to her.

"…Shut up."

He smiled and pulled off the lid revealing scraps of paper of various colors. He walked back to the bed and sat down beside her, handing her the box as he looked through the papers with a smile.

_A six-year-old Roxas stood over Kairi as she drew on a paper, covering it with her hands so he couldn't see. Roxas continued to try and pry her hand away from the paper so he could see what she was hiding. Kairi finally had enough and pushed him to the ground where he stayed with a pout until Kairi turned around with the paper hidden behind her back. _

_"Ready!?" She asked with a toothy grin. Roxas nodded and got to his hand and knees and looked up at her, his blue eyes sparkling with curiosity. "Tada!!" She showed of the drawing of a stick-man drawing of Roxas and herself with a heart over their heads. There were also scribbles across the top that Roxas looked at with confusion, considering the young boy could not read. But considering Kairi didn't know how to write either, it wouldn't have done him any good anyway. _

_"Was dat mean?" He pointed towards her colorful scribbles. _

_"Kairi, loves Roxas!" She beamed with a smile._

_"Oh!" He grinned and nodded in understanding. "I wanna do one too!"_

_Kairi giggled and lead him back to the small table where she assisted him in a drawing of his own._

Kairi smiled at Roxas' drawings, instead of drawing stick-men, he had drawn circles with stick arms and legs coming from their respected places, with color blobs as the hair. Needless to say, she was the more artistic of the two at that age.

"That game?" He smiled looking at her.

She nodded and looked down at her hands. "Roxas…" He replied with a 'hm'. "You wanna play?"

Roxas looked over at her with wide eyes, checking to see if she was pulling his leg as well this time, but saw she was blushing. He laughed and ruffled her hair again. "Let's play Kaikai."

She smiled before tackling him off the bed, landing on top of him. "I make the rules."

"Fine with me." He managed to say before she pressed her lips up against him to silence him, and start the game.

**Silly children and their games. R&R. Or not. Whatever floats your boat.**


	2. SpiderMan

**Well, it was a oneshot, but then I got this idea, and it tied in with the first chapter so... Eh! **

**Disclaimer: I do not own "Girlfriend" or ...what is it? "Best of Both Worlds"? Eh iunno. I'm just listening to what my sister is singing. Or Oreos or Mountain Dew (Just the 12 pack in the corner of my room)**

Kairi flipped her hair around as she sung into her hairbrush. It was another rainy Saturday morning, and she had been confined to her room until it was completely clean. And so far, it was looking out to be a very, very long Saturday.

"She's like! So whatever! You could do, so much better! I think we should get together now!" She climbed up onto her bed before continuing with her song, "That's what everyone's talking 'bout!" She continued to sing, jumping up and down on her bed.

"Kairi!" She stopped, dropping the hairbrush and plopping down on her bed as her mother opened the door. "Kairi, have you even started?"

Kairi looked around and leaned over the side of her bed, grabbing a pillow and placing it at the head of her bead, smoothing out the wrinkles of the pillowcase with her hand before looking at her mom with a smile. Her mom rolled her eyes and looked around at the messy room.

"I'm going to the store, do you need anything?"

"The usual," She said looking over at her empty corner where she usually kept her stash of Mountain Dew and Oreos.

"Well, unless you want Roxas to get an early birthday present, you'll have this room clean, understand?"

Kairi's eyes widened and nodded, jumping off her bed and picking up dirty clothes from her floor as her mom smirked and left the room. After her mom had left, she sat back down on her bed and looked around for her hair brush before going back to singing as she kicked things under her bed.

"You get the best of both worlds! Chill it out, take it slow! Then you rock at the show!!" She picked up a shirt from her floor and saw something small and black scurry "You get the best of bot-..both..SPIDER!!" She screamed and jumped onto her bed, dropping all of her clothes back onto the floor. She whimpered as she looked over the edge of her bed.

She reached over to her bedside table and grabbed her cell, hitting the speed dial.

&&&

Roxas groaned as his phone continued to vibrate against the wood of his dresser. He reached a hand from underneath the sheets and tried to find it as he buried his head under his pillow. He grabbed it and flipped it open, putting it to his ear.

"What, for the love of all that is holy, what Kairi?"

"_Roxas, you have to get here, now, like ASAP._"

"I'm sleeping," He muttered.

"_Roxas please, I'm scared._"

Roxas sat up in his bed and narrowed his eyes. "Kairi, its too early for you to be scared of your reflection, just go back to sleep."

"_Please!_" He gritted his teeth as she continued to plead.

"Alright, alright, give me five minutes."

He hung up, and then kicked the sheets off of his body and sighed, might as well be ready for cleaning, it _was_ Kairi after all.

&&&

She sat with her knees against her chest as she kept her eyes on the pile of clothes where **it** had been. Jumping as the door opened, and looking up to see Roxas frowning as he looked around the room. She jumped off her bed and ran over to him, jumping in to his arms, causing him to nearly fall over.

"It's not even that bad, just start in on-"

She cut him off with a scream as she pointed to her clothes. Roxas looked towards the pile and chuckled as he saw the small spider scurry from a pair of jeans to a shirt.

"That's what you woke me up for?"

"KILL IT!"

He sighed and walked to her bed, dropping her with a smirk.

"No."

"No? No!? What the hell do you mean no!?" She yelled, "It's going, to EAT ME!"

"Kairi, one, that spider is completely harmless, two, it wouldn't be here if you kept your room halfway decent, and three," He smiled, "I need beauty sleep." He fell onto her bed and turned away from her. "Now clean your room."

"Roxas," she whined, climbing on top of him and sitting on his stomach. "Please get it!"

"Can't."

"Yes you can!"

"Not with your fat ass on me I can't."

This earned him a slap in the face, but also got her off of him. He sat up and grabbed an empty can of Mountain Dew and went over to the clothes. He moved them around for a few minutes before finding the spider clinging to her shirt; he held it over the can and used his finger to make it move down and into the can. He stood and held the can out to Kairi who fell off the bed and hid behind it on the opposite side.

He rolled his eyes and exited the room with the spider, Kairi staring at her room in disgust, wondering how many friends the spider had hidden in her shoes.

He came back a few minutes later, thankfully can-less, and looked around her room.

"Man Kairi…" Shaking his head as he sat on her bed, "What kind of girl can deal with this?"

She popped up from the side of her bed and glared at him. "The kind that will kick your ass if you don't shut up." She ducked back behind the bed to try and fish out her favorite skirt that was underneath it.

He stood and then jumped on her bed, laying on his stomach and hanging over the edge to look at her.

"…Hey Roxas."

"Hm?"

"Roll over."

"Why?"

"Let's play Spiderman."

He smirked and rolled over on his back, and looked at her. "Alright Mary-Jane."

**Everyone get that? You know? In the movie...he's all upside down and whatnot. And she kisses him? Comprehenda? :D Good. R&R**


	3. Guitar What Now?

**Roxas and Kairi are playing more games! Games that the average person should have played before -coughEternalSnowxxxcough- And if they haven't they need to go educate themselves. Or Kairi will pawn them. I do not own Guitar Hero… Well I do, but not in the sense where I get paid for mentioning it in a press conference or on the playground. **

Kairi glared outside her window, it was raining _again_. This was really interfering with her weekend shopping sprees. Being confined to her house on a Saturday when she was free of school and homework sucked. And she needed entertainment. She stomped out of her room and to her older brother's room. Axel was in college, but luckily had left what she was getting, behind.

She dug through his closet, pulling out a game console. She carried it downstairs and sat on the floor in front of the television. After taking about ten minutes to get it hooked up she ran back up the stairs and back into his room. She went to the corner, where games and DVDs were stacked ever so neatly, and pulled out one from the bottom, causing the rest to tumble down. She ignored the cases scattered at her feet and then went back to the closet and pulled out a game controller, in the shape of a guitar.

She carried it with her to her room, where she picked up her phone, and then walked back downstairs, hitting the overused number four button for speed dial.

GWUTP

Roxas sighed as the phone vibrated. He knew who it was, and he knew it was well before eight o'clock without even moving from under the sheets. He wondered, if it was really worth it to answer, if he didn't, he could easily block out the vibrating while going back to sleep. And if he did, he would surely be dragged out of his bed and from his warm, safe, Kairi-less bed. Maybe that was the downside, being Kairi-less in the bed. But it was also an upside. And he decided it was best to go with the downside of being in a Kairi-less bed, and sleeping.

The phone stopped vibrating and Roxas smiled as he closed his eyes again. Joy overfilled him when it didn't vibrate again, and he would have broken something had he not wanted to get out of the bed. The sleep was beckoning as he shut his eyes, no sound, nothing.

Until he heard footsteps on the stairs, he cringed, was it his mom? No the footsteps were too light… Or was it Kairi, and if it was Kairi, she would be pretty pissed to have to walk to his house. It was he who usually was made to walk the short distance between them. His bedroom door was opened to reveal his little sister with the house phone.

"Roooxie!" She climbed onto his bed and jumped on his back. "It's Kaiwi." Roxas groaned and put a pillow over his head.

"Naminé get out, tell her I'm busy."

Naminé put the phone to her ear, "Roxie's busy, he's sleepin'" Roxas heard Kairi say something and sighed, "Roxie, she says nap times over and you need to put pants on before you come over," She giggled and moved the pillow from his head and put the phone to his ear.

"Naminé, go tell mom that we aren't taking Kairi with us on vacation this year okay?"

A horrified look came upon her face and she shook her head before bouncing off his bed and running towards the door, she turned and stuck out her tongue and then scurried down the hallway and to the stairs.

Roxas collapsed back onto his bed and put the phone to his ear, "Yes princess?"

"My house. Pronto." He narrowed his eyes as she hung up on him.

He really didn't like this new mood swinging, demanding side of Kairi. Hormones sucked.

GWUTP

Kairi danced to the door, almost wondering why Roxas didn't just walk in like he usually did but figured he was an idiot anyway and it didn't matter. That's friendship for you. She opened the door to reveal Roxas with his usual Saturday bed head and scowl. Oh, and he was wet of course, because he always gets to walk in the wondrous rain on these days…

"Awh, aren't you a ray of sunshine on my rainy day!" She pinched his cheeks. He swatted her hand away and pushed past her to get out of the doorway. "Somebody woke up on the wrong side of the bed."

"Somebody woke up to a five year old jumping on their back is more like it." He muttered.

"Awh quit whining, you're totally killing my buzz," She skipped by him and towards the living room. "Come on! I've got a game!"

"Strip poker?"

"You wish."

"That I do."

She rolled her eyes and stood in front of the television with her arms crossed. Roxas looked behind her to see the guitar in the floor. He arched a brow and looked back to her.

"I declare Guitar Hero battle." She grinned, motioning towards the television.

"Guitar what?" He crossed his arms and stared at the controller.

"You've never played this!?" She cried.

"Nope, can't say I have."

"Oh my…"

"It's a game?"

"Uh duh!?" She groaned and walked over to the wall, flipping the light switch and then getting the television remote from the couch and turned it on.

She then sat in front of the T.V and turned on the console. Placing the guitar strap around her neck, she stood and looked back towards Roxas.

"It'd be more fun with two guitars, but Axel broke the other one."

"Do I want to know?"

"How do rock stars usually break their guitars?"

Roxas nodded in understanding and then sat on the couch. Kairi smirked and turned back towards the game. Roxas watched as she maneuvered through the menus occasionally stomping her foot when hitting the red instead of green.

"Alright! How much you want to bet I can pawn your emo ass on Expert while you do Easy!?" She exclaimed, shooting him a small smile.

"If you do, "pawn" me," he put air quotes around 'pawn' with a smirk; her lingo was getting worse and worse as time wore on. "Then I'll clean your room for the week." He was interrupted by Kairi yelling "Pawnage!" before he continued, "But If I win, I get to pick the next game."

She smiled and nodded and turned back to the screen. She selected Expert and scrolled through the songs before finding one to her liking.

"Heart Shaped Box?" He laughed, "Going retro on me huh?"  
She turned to him and shook her finger in a disapproving manner, "Roxas, Roxas, not retro, classical." She turned back to the screen as the music started.

Roxas scoffed and watched as Kairi started to bob along with the music. He snickered; she looked awkward, but not so much as to where she looked like a complete fool.

"Getting into it aren't we?" He asked.

"Shh!" She flapped an arm at him before the notes began to come on the screen.

Roxas soon stopped his taunting as she flawlessly got through the intro, eyes wide as she sung along with the song while continuing her perfect streak. Roxas bit his lip as he watched her, if she didn't screw up…

"Holy crap is that a kitten!?" Roxas rushed to the window.

Kairi turned away from the game and pulled the guitar over her head and rushed to the window. She shoved Roxas out of the way and leaned against the window ceil and pressed her face against the window, looking for the nonexistent kitten.

"Where is it!?" She turned to glare at him. "Roxas what happened to the poor kitten!?"

Roxas sighed and looked down, trying not to smile or laugh. He smiled as he heard the song end abruptly, the sound of a broken amp blaring.

"My game!" She rushed towards the controller and stomped her foot in annoyance. "So not fair! I get a redo!"

"No, no," He laughed, "You can't blame the kitten for costing you your turn."

"Roxas!!" She whined crossing her arms. "That's not fair!"

He shrugged and walked towards her. She moved in front of him and blocked his way to the controller. She held up a hand before turning around and picking it up.

"I hate you," She frowned.

"So what?" He smiled, holding out his hand.

"I'm still a rock star!" She smirked and then held the guitar over her head and brought it down, smashing it on the floor.

Roxas stared at the ruined guitar as Kairi smiled and turned off the console. She turned the lights back on and walked over to him with a smile.

"Guess this means no strip poker huh?" He said with a defeated sigh.

"Nope!" She chirped, "But my room shall be clean all this week! But guess what!?"

"What."

"We can play games while you clean!"

Roxas inwardly cried, and he was sure his tears were falling faster than the rain. The stupid rain that kept him trapped at Kairi's on Saturdays.

"Hey Roxas."

"Hm?"

"You owe me a kitten."

**I believe I have the next idea for this already. Strip poker anyone? R&R. ALSO. Got another Roxiri, We Build Then We Break. It was going to be multichaptered but since I have gotten no feedback for it, it may remain the way it is. **


	4. Strip Poker

**Well, finally here's the strip poker. I just realized by naming the chapters, I ruin the games. But bleh. Who cares. They're playing strip poker for TrixRabbit's sake. Er...Enjoy?**

Roxas's eyes shot open as his phone played loudly in his ear. Turning his head to see the screen, he flipped it open and groaned. It was Kairi, of course, and she hadn't even waited till seven, it was three in the morning, and he really didn't want to put up with anything she had to say at the moment. He hit ignore and snapped the phone back shut. It wasn't ten seconds after he had shut his eyes when it started to go off again. He muttered curses as he flipped open the phone and answered.

"What the hell do yo-" Roxas stopped mid sentence when he heard her sobbing. "Are you crying?"

"Please," He winced, "Come over?"

"Five minutes." He shut the phone and climbed out of his bed, pulling pants on and heading for his bedroom door.

He soon regretted not putting a shirt on as stood outside her house, the rain hitting his back and neck as he tried to stand under the awning. The door opened and he quickly stepped in, pushing her to the side in his attempt to get out of the rain. He shook his head, spraying water on the walls and on her face and turned to face her. To put it nicely, she looked _awful_. Her hair was pulled back in a messy bun, with strands falling around her face, her eyes were red and puffy, mascara stained her cheeks and her lip was bleeding, and she looked like she could burst into tears at the drop of a pen.

He shifted uneasily as he watched her stare at her feet. _This _wasn't Kairi, she never got this upset over anything.

"Is your mom okay?" She shrugged and nodded. "Your dad not coming home?" She shook her head. He sighed and looked around the empty house. He knew she was alone; her mom probably had the overnight shift at the hospital since her car wasn't here.

The two stood in silence, Roxas trying to figure out what was wrong with her, and Kairi staring at her pink polished toes.

"Do you want to leave?" Roxas's gaze fell back on her, she was looking at him, dropping her gaze and trying to keep her face straight ahead.

"No," He frowned, "Do you want me to?" She shook her head, took his hand and led him through the hallway and into the living room.

She pulled him down onto the couch and curled up next to him. Roxas sat, with her under his arm, and looked down at her.

"What happened?" He felt her bury her face into his shirt. "Kairi."

"Seifer."

"Seifer?" He pulled away from her. "Did you-"

"No, it's stupid. But I don't want it to happen." Roxas arched a brow and she rolled her eyes. "Just forget it."

"But you're cr-"

"Correction, I _was_ crying," She leaned away from him and onto the arm of the sofa. Roxas smiled, _this_ was Kairi. "Wipe that smirk off your face, I'm done." She went to stand and he grabbed her around the waist and pulled her onto his lap. "Roxas."

"Wanna play a game?"

"No. I want to go to the kitchen and eat carton of ice cream." She tried to stand and used her hands to push off of the couch but he wrapped his arms around her, restricting any movement.

"It's almost four in the morning, and it's a Saturday. It's game day. And I want to play a game."

She was silent, she glanced around the room and her eyes landed on the coffee table in front of them, and the small box sitting on the edge.

"Strip poker."

Roxas grinned as she reached across the table and grabbed the deck of cards. She wriggled out of his lap and sat on the couch next to him. Opening the box and removing the cards, she tossed the empty box behind her and onto the floor and began looking through the deck. Roxas watched as she threw out the jokers and then began to deal out the cards.

"Plan on cheating?" He asked as she laid the cards on the table and gave him two cards.

"Against you? It'd be pointless."

"You just want my pants off."

"Maybe."

Roxas looked at his cards and frowned. A nine and four of clubs, she definitely had this round. He looked up to see her smiling at her hand. She looked up and smirked. She then placed three cards on the table, a queen of hearts, an ace of spades, and a four of hearts.

"Shirt."

"Not fair."

"Just say pants."

"Pants."

She laid down her hand. A queen of spades, and four of hearts.

"Son of a bitch."

"Take them off."

Roxas stood and unbuttoned his pants, letting them drop to the ground. He stepped out of them and sat back down on the couch.

"Nice boxers." Penguins.

"Its cold in here, we should snuggle for warmth."

She rolled her eyes and grabbed the cards off the table and shuffled the deck again. He watched nervously as he realized he only had his boxers.

"Time out"

"Shut up and take your cards." She slammed two cards down on the table and took two for herself.

"This isn't fair, we're supposed to be even when we start."

"Your fault."

He flipped the ends of the cards up and smiled. Two jacks. That should assist him somehow right? He looked up to see her smirking again.

"Really?"

"Oh really." She winked and laid down two kings.

"What the hell!" He threw his cards over his head. "You've got to be rigging this when you shuffle."

"Sore loser."

"You're cheating."

"Just take off your boxers."

"No."

"I will."

"You're wearing boxers?" She glared at him. "You strip down to nothing, and I'll take them off."

Kairi stood and pulled the shirt she was wearing over her head and reached around to unhook her bra. Roxas jumped up, grabbed her wrists and smiled.

"Let's just play a different game."

"Works for me."

She then reached down and pulled his boxers down.

**Woot Kairi wins again. Yeah I don't know what Seifer did. But he did something. Maybe I'll try to cover that elsewhere. I'm open for game suggestions. Cause I'm running out. Now, I'm going to cry over spilt milk, so leave a review if you feel like it, if you don't I understand. It's difficult to do. Expressing opinions and all. Er... Thanks for reading!?**


	5. Games Gone Wrong

**Rant: Might I just say, I adore (sarcasm) how MOST, not all, because some of you guys are awesome, of you guys fav and alert and give NO feedback whatsoever. I'd be fine with a "goodchap update soon plz." Because I KNOW that you want me to. And this use to not bother me, but now, I'm writing Roxiri more so than ANYTHING. Not a lot of people like that. So the few of you guys that do, it'd be nice to know that you at least LIKE what I'm putting out. But regardless. I heart Roxiri, and will continue none the less. I'm JUST saying.**

**AN: Anyway. I want to THANK Kalulu 1080 for offering up some ideas for Kairi and Roxas. Up to this point, it has mainly revolved around the two of them and ONLY them. But Kalulu's suggestions branched out into team sports. And so I had to add in more characters of course. **

Roxas sat on the edge of her bed, watching as she pulled a black sock with yellow polka-dots on her foot. Her hair was pulled up in a bun, clad in a pair of his black shorts and his yellow shirt, she began digging through a pile of various coloured socks, and looking for a match to the one she had on. She had almost every colour imaginable, shades of blues, reds, yellows, and greens; some were even tie-dyed, polka-dotted and striped.

"You're making us late. Just put one on." He was hit with a sock and shushed. And so he sat. Waiting.

"Found it!" She grinned as she pulled on the sock, wiggling her toes. She then frowned and looked around the mess of a room, "Now, where'd I put my shoes…"

Roxas fell backwards onto her bed. They were going to be late. That much was apparent to him.

Kairi bounced along to her music behind him. He sighed, it was blaring, and her singing was obnoxious. But he left her to it. No need to get her mad yet.

The two were on their way to the park. Roxas's cousin had invited the two to a game of baseball. And Kairi had jumped at the idea, while Roxas was less than enthusiastic. He didn't even know Kairi _liked_ baseball.

"Roxas!" She yelled.

"What?" He stopped, turning around only for her to walk into him.

"What the mess, watch what you're doing!" She pushed past him, walking ahead.

He stood. Motionless, still looking back towards her house. And again regretted crawling out of bed on a Saturday.

"Hurry up! Stop dilly dallying!" He turned towards her to see her twirling in place, smirking. "You're making us late."

Annoyed, he chased her all the way to the park. A group of teenagers sat atop the jungle gym, waiting and laughing as the two ran up. Roxas immediately recognized his cousin from a distance, and most of the others that sat around him.

"Roxas!" A blonde girl swung down from her seat beside Sora and rushed over to the two newly arrived teens. Roxas still glaring, Kairi still humming.

The blonde threw herself at Roxas, wrapping her arms around his neck. Returning the embrace, he grinned, Naminé. He liked her, he had to admit. And she smelt like strawb–Ohshit.

He felt a finger tap his shoulder, and looked to his left to see Kairi staring. Arms crossed, hip to one side. And _extremely_ close.

"We're here to play ball, not rape each other."

Naminé slowly let go of him, dropping her arms to her side and stepping away. The others had neared, laughing as Roxas stared at his feet.

A curly blond haired boy walked over, slapping Roxas on the back. "Come on Cool Whip, let's get this game started before Strawberry attacks." Roxas shot said boy a confused look. But he merely waved it off and turned to the others. "Okay, who's captains?"

"Me! Me! Me!" Sora jumped up and down, waving his hands in the air. "Hayner, pick me!"

Hayner however ignored the boy and looked through the teens. "One boy and one girl? Sound good?" They all nodded, except for Sora who continuously jumped in the air screaming. "Strawberry, you're up. And…Riku."

Riku exchanged a glance with Kairi and nodded. "Ladies first," He stated, moving to one side, while she moved to the opposite.

"Sora." The boy was ecstatic at being picked first and quickly jumped to her side, sneering at the others. Kairi simply rolled her eyes and began looking through the teens for her next pick.

"Naminé." The blonde walked over to the platinum haired boy and whispered something in his ear, before standing beside him, smiling at Roxas when he would look over at her.

"Um, her." Kairi stated, pointing to a brunette who smiled and walked over, introducing herself as Olette to Kairi and took her place next to Sora.

"Roxas." Roxas swallowed, watching Kairi send death threats with her eyes as slowly approached team Riku. But it wasn't his fault, she should have picked _him_.

No longer cowering, Roxas stood next to Naminé, who leaned against him flirtatiously while smiling at Kairi.

Kairi gritted her teeth, and pointed to Hayner who joined their side.

Picking and choosing continued and soon the teams were as follows; Kairi, Sora, Olette, Hayner, Tidus and Riku, Naminé, Roxas, Selphie, Wakka.

Riku's team batted first. Kairi assigned herself to pitcher, while the others went and covered their desired bases or spots in the outfield, and soon the game was underway.

Wakka went up to the plate first, spreading his legs apart, he stood, the bat over his shoulder and waited. Kairi however, was far more distracted with two flirting blondes behind him. She gripped the ball, her knuckles turning white. Bringing her arm back, she threw the ball towards Wakka, he had gotten distracted while waiting for her, and missed the first pitch, swinging way too late, earning the boy a strike.

Meanwhile, while Kairi was busy taking her anger out on Wakka, Roxas stood with Naminé and watched the game. Or tried. She kept talking. And while he did enjoy _looking_ at Naminé, listening to her was a completely different story. He had no idea what she was going on about, something about a store at the mall that didn't have her shoe size. About the snobby cashier who charged her too much, to Kairi's questionable outfit. He just didn't _want_ to listen.

And so when Kairi had struck Wakka out, Roxas jumped at the chance to be the next one up to bat. He took the bat from Pence, his friend who had decided he would much rather score keep than play, and stood at the patch of grass that designated the home plate.

He looked at his friend; she stood, feet together, watching him. He offered a smile, but only received a glare in return.

"Come on Kairi," He called jokingly, "Strike me out."

Kairi continued to glare at him, and before he realized it had happened, she had thrown the ball past him and into Olette's glove. Olette tossed the ball back to her teammate, and Roxas stared at Kairi. She wasn't playing. She was mad, and he knew he'd have to face her after the game.

He got into position again, waiting this time, not looking away from her. Her eyes narrowed and she released the ball, this time though, the ball came into contact with his bat and sent it into left field where Sora scrambled for it.

Roxas took off, heading for first base while Sora tossed the ball to Hayner at second.

Kairi watched Roxas with a frown; he smiled and waved at the home plate, ignoring her completely. She turned to see Naminé up, waving back at him.

Olette tossed the ball back to Kairi, who turned to face Naminé. The girl stood awkwardly, holding the bat above her head, and the site was so sorry, Kairi nearly collapsed from laughter, but just to keep up her rep, she smirked at the girl, who simply smiled back.

"Watch her Naminé!" Roxas yelled, earning him a glare from Kairi.

Naminé stood, waiting, and soon adjusted her stance to that of what she had seen Roxas in.

Kairi threw the ball at the blonde, who simply let the ball pass her by, stepping back slightly to get out of its path. Olette tossed the ball back to Kairi, who again got in position. The ball was thrown again, and Naminé again just stood there.

"You're supposed to swing bimbo!" Kairi yelled, catching the ball again.

"Kairi!" Roxas yelled but she nearly waved him off.

Naminé smiled at Kairi, getting back into position. Kairi threw the ball again, and this time Naminé swung.

The bat hit the ball…sending it right into Kairi's stomach. The redhead screamed, fell forward, and then looked up at Naminé quickly before returning her gaze to the ground.

Naminé dropped the bat, and quickly ran over to the girl, apologizing left and right. Roxas and the others soon joined the two, everyone kneeling or looking over shoulders to see.

"Kai?" She continued to look down. "Hey, Kairi, are you okay? Di-"

"You." She pointed a finger at Naminé, whose eyes widened. "I'm going to _kill_ you as soon as I can breathe properly."

"I'm so so so sorry! It was an accident!" Naminé cried.

"Chill out, she didn't mean to hit you Strawberry." Hayner said with a soft laugh.

Hayner found himself kneeling on the ground next to her after getting a swift hit near his midsection.

"Guess the game's over then?" Roxas asked, placing a hand on Kairi's shoulder.

"Oh _hell_ no." Swatting his hand away she stood. "Back to the plate." She said, glaring at Naminé.

Naminé nervously walked back to the plate, picking up the bat and getting into position while the others all dispersed from the pitchers mound.

Roxas however remained. "Don't hurt her." Kairi rolled her eyes. Pushing him away, she picked up the ball.

Roxas eyed her as he walked back to first. Kairi blew a kiss at him before turning back to Naminé. He was worried, Naminé was going to get hurt. He could see it already.

"Ready?" Kairi called, eyeing the blonde. Naminé nodded.

The ball flew out of her hand right towards the blonde who had to jump back to avoid it.

"Kairi!" Roxas yelled. "Quit trying to hit her and play the game."

She gave him the finger before turning back to the blonde at the plate. Roxas sighed and watched Naminé shift nervously from foot to foot under Kairi's gaze.

And then it happened. Kairi threw the ball, it hit Naminé's leg, and she fell over. Kairi grinned. Roxas yelled. And then. Naminé got up. She slowly walked over to Kairi.

"Ohmygeez, it was an accident, I'm so so sorry." She mocked.

Roxas ran up to the two, watching them stare each other down. And then it got worse.

Naminé slapped her. Roxas took a step forward, arm outstretched but stopped when Naminé hit her again, causing Kairi to tackle the blonde to the ground.. Both were yelling, pulling hair, and kicking.

"Kairi!" Roxas grabbed the redhead around the stomach and pulled her off of Naminé. She struggled against him, trying to make him drop her by kicking at his shins.

Naminé crawled away from the two, getting a good distance away while Roxas continued to hold the screaming redhead.

"Naminé." Riku walked over, motioning for Naminé to leave. She nodded and the two went to the opposite side of the field.

Sora and the others gathered around, Kairi still screaming. Roxas looked up at the others, wrapping his arms around hers to keep her from flailing.

"You guys go; we'll meet up later for a rematch." He said, smiling up at them before getting hit in the face with the back of her head.

"Good luck man."

"Bye Roxas."

"And so the Strawberry whips the cool."

"Shut up Hayner, nobody gets it."

The group left. And Roxas continued to hold onto her even after she had stopped thrashing and screaming.

"Kairi?"

"S-shut up." He slowly let his grip loosen. Making sure she wouldn't turn and hit him.

"Are you o-"

"What do you care?" She turned to face him. "What the hell was _that_?"

He frowned, avoiding her gaze. She laughed under her breath before looking away.

"Why'd you hit Naminé?"

"Why did you let her hit _me_? You were _right_ there." She seethed. "And you _know_ why I hit her."

Roxas chewed at the side of his mouth, "You des-"

"I what?"

"…You deserved it. You were being a b-"

She slapped him, stopping him. "No, you were being a jerk."

"How? I didn't do _anything_."

"You let her hit me. We were fair, and I didn't even throw the ball that hard. And you let her hit me."

"Yo-"

"Look." She lifted her shirt, showing him her stomach, a small bruise was forming where she had been hit. "It _hurt_."

Roxas stared at the slightly purple mark before looking up at her. "I'm sorry."

"Worst. Saturday. _Ever_."

He pulled her shirt back down before pulling her back towards him. "Kairi."

"Let me go."

"No."

"Now."

"Kiss?"

"No."

"Kiss and a slap?"

"…"

Roxas was content with the red mark on the side of his face as he walked her home. He was used to it anyway.

**So. In my opinion I could have reworded the ending to make it better. But regardless. I gave you a chapter. I have another one up and ready. But how fast I put it up, is up to YOU guys. Not me. Be nice. Be rude. But be SOMETHING. And again, thank you Kalulu 1080. And to all those who have reviewed, alerted and fav'ed. That's right. I love you regardless.**


	6. All The Wrong Places

**I know I ranted last chapter, and I'm also aware that I'm updating twice in the same day. (Bad Omen!) But this is for Kalulu 1080! Even though this wasn't one of the suggested ideas. But regardless, here's another chapter.**

"If she's there, I'll hit her, I swear to-"

"Please don't start anything tonight Kai," Roxas shook his head. "I won't talk to her. I promise."

"Hmph." She walked ahead of him. Turning she stuck out her tongue, and pouted. "Look!" She pulled her shirt up, "You can _still_ see it!"

"…Kairi that's Sharpie." She shrugged, dropping her shirt and turning away.

The two continued in silence towards the park. Sora had again invited them to play a game. Only this time, he hadn't informed them of what game would be played. Roxas hadn't wanted to come. After last week's incident, he just didn't need the stress. But Kairi had insisted. After all, she had a score to settle. And she hoped that there would be something there she could use to hit Naminé with.

"Think we'll play baseball again?"

"No. Definitely not." He smiled. "I told Sora if we came, the game would have to be catfight proof."

Kairi whined, falling in step beside him. "That's no fun." She twirled a piece of her hair around her finger. "Why so late though? It's almost dark."

Roxas shrugged. He didn't question much anymore.

* * *

"Hey guys!" Sora ran up to the two, ruffling Roxas's hair and nodding at Kairi. "You ready for the game?"

Kairi pushed Roxas aside, nearly causing the boy to fall over. "What are we playing Sora?"

"Hide and seek." He announced with a smile.

"…"

"…Really?" Roxas asked.

"You told me to pick a nonviolent game, so it was either this or rock, paper, scissors."

"Oh! Let's pl-"

"Hide and seek sounds great." Roxas interrupted. Casting a sideways glance at the redhead. He knew how _she_ played rock, paper, scissors.

Sora nodded. And motioned for the others to head over. And as Roxas scanned the group, he saw that a certain blonde was nowhere to be seen.

"Where's Naminé?" He felt Kairi pinch his arm; squirming away he pinched her back.

"She knew Strawberry was coming so she hid already," Hayner announced. Smirking, he air-fived Kairi.

Roxas watched with slight amusement as they carried out a handshake from afar. "Hayner."

"Hm?" The blond looked away from his silent conversation with Kairi to his friend.

"Why Strawberry and Cool Whip?"

"Hayn-" Olette started only for him to interrupt.

"You guys go together like Strawberry and Cool Whip! And she's got you _whipped_."

"Wha…"

"…Well I like it." Kairi said, patting Roxas's cheek. "So who's it?"

"ME!"

And so Sora was it. The rest of the teens scattered, tripping in the dark. Roxas headed for the playground. Climbing onto the equipment, he hid in the slide, sliding until he was halfway down before stopping. Smiling, he adjusted were he was on his back comfortably.

And then he was hit. Someone had followed him. But it was too dark to see who. He felt a hand in his hair, ruffling it and flattening it.

"Roxas!" He frowned. Naminé.

"Be quiet. You'll get us caught."

"Hehe, oops, sorry." She whispered, still playing with his hair.

"Naminé, you-uh. It's cheating to use someone else's spot."

"But I can't get out now! I'll be quiet I promise."

He closed his eyes, thinking of ways to get her to _leave_. "Climb out the top."

"I'm wearing a skirt."

"I can't _see_." He groaned, "I can't even see me."

She was quiet. And so they just sat there. His head against her legs, while he tried not to slide down.

* * *

Kairi was halfway up the tree, searching for another foothold, she continued up. She was _queen_ of hide and seek. And she was sure no one would find her up here. Especially Sora. When she reached a limb big enough to support her laying down, she leaned against the trunk of the tree, took out her iPod and closed her eyes. Keeping her arms on two other limbs next to her, she was practically in a tree chair. And soon enough, she was practically asleep.

* * *

"It's hot in here."

"Yeah."

"You think so too?"

"Yeah."

"Would you say something else besides "Yeah", already?" She huffed. Pushing her feet further under his neck.

Roxas remained silent. This was worse than the baseball game. Much worse. Then he could have walked away, but now, he could risk losing the game, or stay with miss-talk-a-lot.

"Hey." Ignore. "Hey?" Ignore."…" She cleared her throat. Ignore. "HEY!" She kicked his shoulder.

"Will you quit! God I swear you're worse than Kairi."

"Oh finally." He looked up at her, not being able to see her face past her legs.

"What?"

"_Kairi._"

"What about her?"

"What do you like about her so much? She's such a bi-"

"No she's not." Lie. But she was _his_ bitchy friend.

Naminé was about to open her mouth to rebuttal when Sora came down the slide at full speed, knocking the two blondes down and out onto the box of sand at the bottom. Naminé crawled off of Roxas, stepping on his arm, apologizing and then tripping again over Sora.

Roxas stood. Looking around, he saw that Riku, Tidus and Pence had already been found. Sora hopped up. Looked around, counted, and then ran off towards the baseball field. Roxas turned his attention to Naminé, offering her a hand he helped her off the ground.

She thanked him, and turned away yawning. "She is."

"Shut up."

"Naminé." She turned to see Riku watching, shaking his head. She sighed, rolled her eyes and turned back to Roxas.

"She is." And then walked over to Riku.

"Well, that's everyone!" Sora said smiling, the group had gathered at the swings.

Roxas looked around at all the faces. And Sora was right they were all there except-

"Where's Kairi?" Roxas looked around the park, seeing that almost all of the places had been checked. "Shit you guys, where is she?"

"Chill Cool Whip, we'll look." Hayner said, turning to the rest. "Okay, operation locate Strawberry is a go. Split up."

The teens scattered once again. Roxas ran through the park, checking behind everyone. And after ten minutes of searching, he felt it. Panic. No one had found her. No one had seen her hide.

The teens were screaming her name, running throughout the park. And she hadn't come out.

What if someone had grabbed her? Kidnapped. Killed. He kept playing out scenarios in his mind as he looked.

And then he had an ingenious idea. He pulled out his phone and called her.

* * *

Kairi awoke to her phone vibrating against her thigh. Cursing she pulled it out, flipped it open and mumbled a hello.

"Kairi!" Roxas screamed. "Kairi, oh god, you're alive."

"No shit, g'night." She flipped the phone shut and sat it on her lap. And as she closed her eyes it rang again. Flipping it open once again she put it to her ear. "What?"

"Where the hell are you?"

"Topeka."

"Kairi, I'm serious, where are you?"

"Hold on." She flipped the phone shut. Slid it back into her pocket, and stuck her headphones back in her ears, stretched, and began climbing down.

* * *

Roxas tackled her to the ground when he saw her emerge from the trees. Screaming she pushed him off of her and turned to look at him.

"What the hell were you doing?" He cried.

"Hiding. I fell asleep."

He sighed, letting his head fall against the ground.

"…You were worried?" She turned to him with a smile.

"You have no idea."

She laughed and looked up at the sky. "Sorry."

"Naminé's a bitch."

"I told you."

"But so are you." He said looking at her, "But you're the good kind."

"Roxas, that's derogative, good kind or not." She turned on her side, looking at him. "Am I really?"

"Sometimes," smiling he mirrored her movements. "I'm glad you're okay though. Seriously, I thought you were dead."

Laughing she turned away from him. "Thanks for caring."

**Shorter, I know. But deal! Please review, feedback equals updates my friends.**


	7. Mr Snuffelumpugus

**IMPORTANT: Thanks to those that pointed out the double Naminé's. I had completely forgotten. So for story sake. We'll just ignore that until I go back and change it yes?**

**Warning: A long author's rant is at the bottom. Feel free to skip. But god forbid, do NOT review. I shouldn't ask for those. And to those who do, I apologize. But to those of you who fav, alert, and review. Thanks.**

**And Jane. Here's your pervy chapter D:**

He rolled over, grabbing his phone and flipping it open. He couldn't believe it. It was nine thirty-two on a Saturday morning and he hadn't been woken up. He sat up and looked through the messages and missed calls just to be sure he hadn't ignored it and forgotten, but alas. Nothing from her. This slightly worried him, because either she was mad, or she was dead. And he wasn't sure which one of those would be better.

He then hit the four on speed dial and placed the phone to his ear. It rang three times before going to her polite voicemail that stated the following; "_Hey this is Kairi, I didn't answer your call because I really don't like you. Or I could be asleep. Guess you'll never know. Leave a message, ciao." _She was a very bitter person.

He hung up, and climbed out of the bed and sat on the edge. Deciding now was the time to go check on Kairi.

* * *

Kairi whined as she went into another coughing fit. She hated it, here she was, sick on a beautiful Saturday. It had been an entire month since they had seen a sunny Saturday, and she was inside. Sneezing her brains out.

Hearing her phone vibrate against her pillow, she cast the small electronic device a glare before ignoring the call. She did _not_ need to hear anyone's voice. Not even her mother who she had locked out earlier the night before.

Sinking down under her sheets, she turned on her side. She felt horrible. Her nose was stuffy, her throat hurt, and her body ached everywhere.

She concluded she got a total of four minutes of silence before her mother began beating on her door. But she couldn't hear her. So she simply crawled out of bed, her hair a mess, clad in only a large t-shirt she was sure wasn't hers, and opened the door of her room to find, not her mother, but Roxas.

Screaming, or squeaking, seeing as her voice would not reach that high at the moment, she closed the door, locking it and began yelling at him.

"Are you sick?"

"No. I recently became a recluse and your hair is the closest thing to the sun I've seen all week."

"Oh." The knob turned. "You going to let me in?"

She rolled her eyes, leaning against the wall, she opened the door, allowing him to walk in and sit on the edge of her bed.

"Oh my go-"

He was hit with a clothes hanger. Courtesy of Kairi.

"I know, I know," she sat next to him. "I'm hideous."

"…I was going to say you _are_ sick."

"Whatever, leave." She turned, crawling back to the head of the bed, and under the covers.

"But it's Saturday."

"But I'm sick."

He turned to look at her. She was sitting against propped pillows. Frowning at him. Her eyes red and puffy.

"Tomorrow then?"

"I get to pick the game," He immediately declined, "cause I'm sick?"

Reluctantly agreeing, figuring she always picked regardless, he stood to leave, before casting her a glance, "Any warnings?"

"We're going to play Mr. Snuffelumpugus. And we're going shopping."

"What the he-"

"You'll see, now leave. Your presence is making me want to vomit again."

Roxas quickly left the room, bidding her get well remarks as he did so.

* * *

"Victoria's Secret?"

"You wish."

"True enough."

The two were walking through the mall. Roxas trailed behind Kairi as she pushed through groups of people, causing Roxas to apologize as he squeezed in between the angry locals.

She hadn't disclosed what she was looking for yet, just for him to follow and not to complain when they got there. So far they had stopped only once, and that was at the restrooms where Kairi had thrown away her breakfast she had been walking the mall with earlier.

"I hate people who just _stand _in the middle of the walkway, don't you Roxy?" She said loudly as she pushed through another group of girls.

Roxas quickly hung back, slowly walking around the angry teenagers who were sending curses at his friend.

Kairi stopped and turned to face him. Arms crossed she waited until he had caught back up with her before she continued.

"Roxas!" Roxas inwardly cringed as he heard Selphie's voice cut through the loud noise and chatter. Kairi continued on, leaving him to fend for himself.

Turning, he gave the brunette a small smile. "'Sup?"

"Was that Kairi?" She pointed past him. "She looks mad."

Shrugging, he cast a glance over his shoulder to see Kairi still walking. "I'm hungry, but she wouldn't go back to the food court."

Selphie laughed softly before grabbing his hand, "Let's go before she notices then, my treat?"

Roxas wasn't against free food. Even in the form of annoying Selphie tag along. And so he allowed her to lead him back to the food court.

* * *

Roxas was sucking on his straw, trying to get the rest of the bits of fruit at the bottom of the smoothie to stick to the bottom so he could eat it, but failing as it would drop when he would get it close to his mouth. Selphie had abandoned him to meet Olette. And now he was just waiting for his phone to start ringing so he could go find Kairi.

Luckily for him, this was unnecessary. He nearly choked on his smoothie as he felt something snap around his neck.

"Where've you been?" he looked up to see Kairi standing over him with a frown.

Roxas reached up to his neck, and felt a nylon collar. Leash clip and all. He glared up at the redhead. "What the hell is this?"

He began fumbling with it, trying to unsnap it, only for Kairi to smack his hands away, and then attach a leash to it.

"Kair-"

"We're playing Mr. Snuffelumpugus."

"I didn't agr-"

"The hell you didn't. Now shut up," She yanked on the leash, causing him to nearly topple out of his seat. "We're going to parade around the mall. With your matching leash and collar."

Roxas quickly got to his feet before she could pull on the leash again, "Kairi, this is stupid, where'd you get this shit anyway!"

"The Dogue store, duh."

"What's Dogue?"

"It's like Vogue, for dogs."

"Aha…Dogue."

"Come, come." She began walking away from the table.

Roxas grabbed the leash and pulled her back. "Not in public."

Rolling her eyes, she snatched the leash from his hand, "If not in public, where else?"

"Psh, you know where."

"Really!"

"Take it off."

* * *

Roxas leaned against the bench with a groan as he waited for Kairi to come out of the dressing room. They had been here for _two_ hours, in the _same_ store. And he was bored. Extremely bored.

"Are you sane?"

He looked up to see her standing over him in a tight fitted dress. Shrugging he looked away from her. "I'm ready to go home."

"Too bad, you pro-"

"I didn't." Rolling her eyes, she pointed a finger at him, and then she left him to mope, and went to look for an alternative outfit.

And this was when he made his escape. Dodging around the racks of clothes, he carefully navigated towards the exit. Slipping out of the store, he cut to the right and began walking towards the food court.

Upon reaching his destination, he simply sat down at one of the empty tables near the mall's exit. But even the surrounding aura couldn't keep _her_ away.

"Roxas?" He looked up to see Naminé standing over him with a frown. Arching a brow, he gestured to the chair across from him. "I find it hard to believe that you're here alone. So where is she?"

Shrugging, he pointed in a random direction. "I got tired of shopping."

"Oh totally." After looking around for signs of the redhead, she slowly took the seat in front of Roxas. "So, like, why not just leave?"

"I value life."

"Hm…Wanna go see a movie?" Roxas simply stared at her. Thinking even Naminé must know how dumb that suggestion was. "Ugh. Well? It's not like she owns you. Come on, come see a movie with me!"

Roxas stared. Weighing the options. If he did decide to go with Naminé to see a movie, he wouldn't have to shop, or be abused, embarrassed, or used as a pack mule. However, if he did decide to go. He would _never_ hear the end of it. Ever. But if he stayed here. He would eventually be found, and chewed out. But if he left, stayed hidden, he could put off the scolding, and possibly hide the fact of him hanging out with the petite blonde in front of him. Dilemma as it was. It didn't take him long to decide.

Nodding, Roxas stood. Naminé rose as well, clapping her hands together with a smile. "Sweet! So, like, what do you wanna see?"

"Oh _Mr. Snuffelumpugus_!" He froze. And immediately wished for death.

Kairi appeared out of seemingly nowhere, hugging Roxas from the side. Casting a glance at Naminé, she gave a small wave and winked, and then, much to Roxas's dismay, began purring as she grinded against his leg.

"Oh Roxie-poo," she ruffled his hair. "Who's a good boy? You are! Yes you are! Especially where it counts, aren't you?"

Roxas stood completely still, face red, as his friend continued, playing with his hair, and occasionally trying to stick her hands into his jean pocket, only for him to quickly move them away. Naminé had already left the two, and soon, the purring girl and frozen boy had become the main attraction of the mall's food court.

After about seven and a half minutes of constant grinding, hair ruffling, and cooing, Roxas regained enough composure to drag Kairi out of the mall. The two stood in the parking lot, Kairi smoothing out her skirt, Roxas glaring with the intent of making her combust.

"What the hell was that!"

"Mr. Snuffelumpugus, obviously."

"No, no no no! How did that ha-"

"Listen Roxas," She closed the distance between the two, grabbing the front of his shirt and pulling him closer. "Quit. Flirting. With. Naminé."

He frowned, removing her hand from his shirt. "What? Jealous?"

She rolled her eyes, "No way in _hell_." He arched a brow. "I'm serious. She's just a stupid whore anyway."

"You're so jealous. I've told you before I don't like Naminé. Yet every time I come within a three foot radius of her body, you pounce."

"That just means I'm looking out for your well being."

"My well being's fine without you having to use me as a strip pole in public places."

"Oh whatever, if it wasn't for me, you'd so be making out with that AID infested whore."

"What's your problem? We're not together, we've _never_ been together. And you've made that point again and again. So what if I _did_ want to hang out with Naminé? I shouldn't have to make sure it's alright with you first. We're _friends_."

Kairi sighed, crossing her arms, "Fine, whatever. I'm going home."

"Good."

Pushing past him, she headed towards the road, leaving him to return to the mall to find Naminé. Just to prove his point.

**AUTHOR RANT: I recently received a review that went a little something like this, (Strong language. Like twice.) and I quote;**

"Fucking review whores. You like this, don't you? You like that I'm paying attention to you? Any attention at all is good, even negative attention. That's how it is to you.

Christ, you people are pathetic. I wish this didn't count as a review, but I  
don't want to go to your profile to PM you, because god knows what I'll run  
into there. Giant fucking attention-whoring review-fishing baby.

Are you happy? Are you stroking yourself under your desk to the thought that someone, somewhere, is paying attention to you? Great. I see you've made peace with the fact that you have no pride, no dignity, and no self-respect. I'll leave you, your ego, and your crappy writing alone now to do whatever it is that you do.

You know, maybe if you spent more time learning to write and less time  
pleasuring your ego with the thoughts of worthless strangers, you wouldn't  
have to beg for reviews like an untalented dog."

**Pause. Excuse me good sir, I don't CARE about how many reviews I get, but I do like knowing HOW I am doing. I DO like worthless strangers telling me I improve because I'm NOT getting this shit published. I don't WRITE in hopes of being some famous ass author, but as a HOBBY on this SITE where feedback is PART of the equation. And I'm aware my writing is often generic and shit full of suck. So thank you. But you know what? I STILL WANT FUGGIN REVIEWS.**

**And to you, my worthless strangers that are my reviewers, those who alert and fav, though I do hate on you, I love you all. And as I am writing this attention-whoring review-fishing baby's note, please be aware of the following;**

**You. People. Make. My. Heart. Sad.**


	8. Let's Race

**Zomg, an update. This chapter here was written in my acts of rebelling against sleep. Started. 1:27 a.m. Also, since you weren't signed in when you reviewed, thank you Ame, Isabel, and an anonymous reviewer who left no name. **

"So how'd you ditch the redheaded bitch?"

"We've been over this." Roxas huffed, grabbing a piece of hair that had fallen in his face, "And don't call her that, okay?"

Naminé shrugged and continued towards the entrance to the mall. It had been three weeks since Kairi had even uttered a word to him. He wasn't even worth a glance in class anymore. And, seemingly, Naminé had taken note. And so now his Saturdays were Naminé filled.

"Whatever," she slowed her pace, allowing him to catch up with her. "I really, like, need new shoes."

He mumbled a confirmation as they entered the mall's noisy food court. The fake palm trees had preteens at their roots, eating a variety of foods. His head pounded as she grabbed his hand and dragged him towards the stores. In all honesty, to the casual observer, Roxas's situation hadn't changed all that much. He was still made to do things against his will, and was dragged along on shopping trips unwillingly. However, this was most definitely not his case.

Naminé was vicious. She never stopped talking. Almost every word that came out of her mouth was a hushed insult about a passerby. And if it wasn't about someone's lack of taste or horrible shoes, it was about her. How she looked. How she felt. How _everything_ was in relevance to her.

And it made him sick.

"Oh! Roxas look at that!" His face was slammed into a glass window before he could utter a response. He was face to face with an extravagant red dress. "That is like, adorable right? I so need it. Don't you think it'd look great?" He pulled his face away from the glass and looked at her, opening his mouth to speak, only for her to interrupt. "I have to have it. Come on!"

He was dragged into the store, a soft ding echoing throughout to alert the vulture-like employees to swamp them to inform them of sales and the like. Roxas groaned inwardly. He hated stores. He hated Naminé. And he hated himself.

Naminé had discarded his arm as she reached the display for the dress and began to leaf through to find her size. With a defeated sigh, he sat down on the floor, and leaned against a mirror, watching her. She squealed as she found her size and scurried to the changing rooms. Roxas being the good dog he was, trailed along, crawling across the floor to await her demands of him complementing her.

However as he made his way across the store on his knees, a flash of red caught his eye. And on instinct, he flinched. After pausing mid-crawl, he looked up to see _her_. She stood with her arms crossed, and a complete Kairi look about her. He rose to his knees, looking away. The two said nothing, she glared him down, and he looked towards the dressing rooms, praying for Naminé to call him over so he could avoid this conversation.

"I dropped som-"

"Shut up." She snapped. He watched with a shocked expression as she walked off, her arms still folded. She dropped the skirt she had had in one hand on the floor as she left the store, taking a left towards the food court.

"Roxie!" Wincing, he turned back to see Naminé twirling in her outfit. Letting out a disgusted grumble, her rose to his feet and headed out of the store. "H-hey!" She rushed over to him, grabbing his arm, "Where are you, like, going?"

"I'm hungry." He cast a glance down at her dress, "It's nice, I'll wait for you." She shrugged, her ego inflated with his complement. She loosened her grip, allowing him to walk off.

He veered left once exiting the store, his eyes scanning the crowds of teens, families and elderly people in tie-dye shirts. He furrowed his brow as he spotted her, sitting at one of the tables placed in the middle of all the food vendors, alone. Her head held up by a propped elbow.

He swallowed, making his way over to her. Without a word, he slipped into the chair in front of her. Her head snapped up and she glared at him, raising her head, she sunk back into the chair, crossing her arms again.

"Kairi, I'm so-"

"Who are you here with?" She interrupted.

He shifted his position in the chair, keeping his face out of her reach. "Naminé."

It was subtle, but it was what he was watching her for. Her teeth had quickly bitten her lower lip before her face was replaced by her previous mask of spite. She let out a huff of air before looking away and letting out a short bark of a laugh. She slammed her hands on the table, and pushed herself to her feet. Roxas scrambled to his feet and tripped over his chair as he tried to grab her arm. Luckily, he simply hit the table beside them before he recovered and successfully grasping her arm.

She was jerked to a stop, but she continued to face away from him, pulling her arm towards herself. "Let. Go." She growled through clenched teeth.

"Naminé, I do-"He stopped short, but he realized his mistake too late, she swung around, her palm coming in contact with his cheek. His hand he had held her with flew to his face, while he raised his other to fend off any other possible attacks. "Shit, Kairi it was a –" His eyes narrowed as he saw her fall to the floor, on her knees. She sat with her hands on her knees, her legs sprawled out behind her as she looked down. He dropped his arms and knelt down in front of her. Her body was shaking, but she refused to look anywhere but the floor. "Kairi?"

She sniffled, hiccupping afterwards. Her hands shot out and she shoved against his chest, pushing him backwards so he fell over. With that she scrambled to her feet and broke out into a run out of the mall. He sat on his rear, holding himself up with his hands as he watched her go. His stomach dropped. Surely she hadn't been crying. Not Kairi. Kairi didn't cry. Ever.

"There you are!" He looked behind him to see Naminé, she was holding a plastic bag, and so he assumed she had indeed gotten the dress. Sighing, he rose to his feet and greeted her with a nod.

"Uh. What were you, doing?" She wrinkled her nose slightly as he moved towards her.

"I… dropped something." He muttered, scowling.

"Right… We'll, let's go to Body Central!"

* * *

Roxas lay on his bed, propping himself up with one arm while holding out his phone in the other, scrolling through locked messages. All from Kairi. They ranged from demanding, yet hilarious requests, to almost heartfelt confessions. Roxas hit the send button on his phone, putting it against his ear as he stood from the couch. It rang twice before going to her voicemail, which vocally trashed him. Cursing, he snapped the phone shut, and shuffled towards the door. He was determined, if she wouldn't answer, he would infiltrate.

* * *

Kairi covered her face with her pillow, fell back on her bed, and screamed. She had ignored him _all_ week. His texts. His phone calls. His attempts to grab her attention at school. But now… After the mall incident, where she had slipped up, she groaned at the thought. Her phone began ringing again, causing her to shoot up. Glancing at the name on the front screen, she picked it up and answered with; "You have the wrong number, this is Kairi. Not Slutzilla." And then collapsed on the bed, snapping the phone shut.

Mindlessly, she flipped the phone back open and scrolled through the list of her contacts, hitting send when she found the one that struck her fancy. The person on the other end of the call answered on the third ring, and she swallowed before speaking.

"I need a favor."

* * *

Roxas stood outside her house with the phone to his ear as he watched her window. Kairi's mother was not home, and so he had no hopes of getting in unless she let him. And so far, the odds were against him. After ten minutes of standing in the sun, he was becoming angry.

He then felt a slap on the back that nearly knocked him over, causing the boy behind him to laugh. "Outta the way chicken wuss." Roxas quickly regained his composure to see Kairi letting Seifer into the house. He shot forward, stopping the door with his foot as she tried to shut it.

"What-what the hell's he doing here?"

"Sex." She reached through the opening in the door and placed a hand on his chest, shoving him backwards and then shutting the door.

He stood dumbstruck, staring at where her head had been. Recovering, he began banging on the door, and yelling. After about seven minutes or so of yelling, the door opened. And Kairi peered through the small opening, shirtless, causing Roxas's eyes to widen slightly as he tried to open the door.

"What?"

"You can't be serious?" He tried to wedge himself between the door.

"I'm busy." She tried to shut the door again only for him to stop it, "Go home."

"Is this supposed to be your way of getting back at me?" He asked, his voice cracking somewhat. She stared at him, her face expressionless. Shaking his head and looking down his breath wavered, "Wish fuckin' granted." He then let the door shut, hearing her fall forward against it. And then he left; a hand against his forehead as he tried to erase the mental images.

* * *

Kairi leaned against the door with a sigh, her head resting against the cool wood. After staying in that stance for a few minutes, she walked over to the couch and grabbed her shirt, pulling it back over her head. With a slight jump in her step, she bounded up the stairs to her room where Seifer sat, playing a video game. "We're done."

He nodded, his eyes locked on the screen as his fingers mashed buttons and jiggled analog sticks. "So what do I tell 'em?"

She leaned against her doorway, crossing her arms as she stared at the screen as well. "Tell him I hated it."

* * *

The following Monday, in math class, Roxas had avoided his normal seat in the left front of the class next to the window, and usually, next to Kairi, to sit in the back. Mostly because he couldn't even stand to see her, but then mostly because he knew if he did have to talk to her, he'd break down and blubber like a five year old. So when she entered with her skirt hiked up basically so everyone could see her ass, Roxas's forehead met his wooden desk with a solid slam.

Their teacher had yet to enter the room, and so he took it upon himself to call her out from halfway across the room. "What the_ hell_ is _that_?" The students in between cast glances between the two, unconsciously parting.

She turned her head, casting him a glance over her shoulder before bending over and allowing the boy behind her to have a pretty much clear shot of seeing her, Roxas hoped, undergarments. He stood, flinging the wooden table away before leaving the room.

What the hell was she doing? First she … He shook his head, grinding his teeth as the mental images resurfaced. And now she was basically revealing herself to the entire junior class.

"Yo! Chicken wuss!" His legs stopped moving. His fists clenched, and he turned on his hill to see the smug approaching blond. "Heard she's lettin' everyone at it, huh?"

His fist automatically shot forward, however, Seifer simply side stepped, sending the poor boy to the floor. He pushed himself to his knees, turning around to see the blond leaning against a set of lockers as students began to gather around the two. It was only a matter of time before the teachers grew suspicious. If he was going to deck Seifer any time soon, it had to be now.

As Roxas clambered to his feet, Seifer spoke. "You know…What was funny?" Roxas narrowed his eyes, before arching a brow. "She cried the entire time, like a bitch. "

Roxas shot forward, arm baring the opposing blonde against the lockers before punching him in the stomach with his free hand. The students around them had begun screaming after the punch was thrown. And before Roxas knew what had happened, Seifer was on the ground, and he was being pulled to the principal's office. However, all he could focus on was Kairi. Crying. Because Kairi _never_ cried.

* * *

Kairi bit her lip nervously as she sat outside the school, occasionally puffing out her cheeks and slowly blowing the air out. Seifer had been released earlier, about an hour prior. However it was now 5:37 p.m. and Roxas was still in the school. Or at least, she figured he was.

She hadn't expected Roxas to confront him. He was usually too much of a pacifist to even argue with anyone other than her. With the fight that had occurred, Kairi had been forced to repay Seifer even more than had originally been offered.

Her head snapped up when the doors of the school opened, revealing the blond haired hero, limping down the steps. She slowly rose to her feet, having been against the school's welcome sign. When his eyes met hers, he looked away and continued on past her. Her brow furrowed as she watching him walk past her towards the sidewalk. He began in the direction of their houses, occasionally stopping to pull up his pants leg.

Guilt raking her being, she followed along behind him, silently. They walked and hobbled for about ten minutes before he spoke.

"Are you okay?" She winced. He was impossible. Was _she_ the one limping along the sidewalk? Was she the one with the black and blue face? No. He was. Why the _hell_ was he asking about her?

"What the hell are you talking about, Roxas?" He stopped, turning to face her as he leaned up against a light post.

"…Seifer said…" He licked his lips; she noticed that they too were swollen. He shook his head, "You're alright?"

She stared at him, her mouth askew. He returned her gaze, his eyes reflecting his obvious concern as he awaited her response. She smiled slightly, looking down. "You're an idiot." Biting her lip again, she looked up. "I'm sorry."

"What for?" He questioned, rubbing his arm.

"Everything? I guess." She offered, stepping forward. "Listen. Seifer and I…" She shut her eyes, looking away. How could she tell him? He got the shit beat out of him for nothing? That's when she realized. She couldn't. He had _fought_ for her. Not _over _her. But _for_ her. She couldn't do it.

"I won't hang around Naminé anymore. We can go shopping. I'll be Mr. Snuffelumpugus. Just… Don't… Not with Seifer…"

Why wouldn't he shut up? Why wouldn't he just… Go home. Be mad at her. Be mad at her for fake sleeping with Seifer. Mad at her for showing a pair of shorts to the boy that sat behind them in math. Why wouldn't he just be mad?

"Kairi?"

"I'll race you home, Roxas. The first one there, gets a piece of Oreo pie." She swallowed, walking past him. "Come on Gimpy." And with that, he hobbled behind her back to his house, where she left him at the front door. He wasn't sure who had won. And he didn't get a piece of Oreo pie.

**8B Yay! They're happy again. Sort of. Anyway, about the long, long, intermission. That review? Sent me into a sad spiral… Sike. No I've just been busy and haven't really had any drive to write this. So I made it extra long! You're welcome! I've actually had parts of this for a while. It was originally two separate ideas, but I tossed them together. Anyway, the usual. Review if you want, but I won't ask because that's low and dog like. However I'm curious. Do you guys think she should tell him? I ended it there because I couldn't make a decision. By the way it's 3:34 a.m now. I feel accomplished. **

**P.S. I just noticed… Most of you want them together. I'm keeping that from happening. Oops. ;D **


	9. Truth or Dare?

**HEY GUYS. c: I'd like to first apologize for being- well, not here. lol I've been. Well, I've been. And you know, I was just sitting around going "I hate this, I hate that, I don't enjoy this, I don't enjoy that" and decided, hey, I loved writing fanfiction, so, get your ass in gear and do something! **

**And this was the product of a skipped class. College is hard guise. Especially when you're hating every second of it. **

**So- you know this has actually turned out into more than what I had originally intended when I first started this. And ff. lol Well here we are, with a somewhat plot tied into this :'3 who knew? **

**Anyway enough from me, here's where we left off-**

**AND YES EVERYONE I KNOW I SCREWED UP WITH THE DOUBLE NAMINES KTHXBYE. I'll fix it one day. Just not today. :c **

**Mild language and somewhat sensual content ahead maties. **

Kairi stood with her fist resting against the door, debating on whether to knock or just head back down the street. It had been about a week since the incident with Seifer, and currently, Roxas hadn't spoken to her since. In reality though, it was only because she had been avoiding him; classes they shared were as close as he had gotten to her, and even then she found some excuse not to pay him any attention.

The looks he often gave her were enough to stomp her heart into pieces. Her entire mind was a battlefield between her desire to just come clean—and more so her desire to just have things back to normal. But his bruises hadn't yet faded away completely and sometimes when she caught him walking down the hallway it looked like his ribs were still bothering him by the way he'd hold himself. Every glance of Roxas or Seifer sent her into a pit of guilt. The thought of even trying to tell Roxas the truth made her sick.

Sighing, she leaned forward, pressing her forehead against the wooden door. What was she doing now then? She had thought she'd be able to come over on a Saturday morning and drag him out of bed—to make out like everything was normal and perhaps make him play video games or go shopping. But as she stood on his porch, all the initial confidence she had was gone. She muttered a string of curses as she withdrew from the door, turning and heading for the sidewalk.

Something snapped however, the thought of going back home to sit on the couch all day feeling bad for herself was enough to turn her ass around and bang on the door with her fist, "Roxas!"

She continued bringing her fist against the wooden door for a few minutes until she heard a lock turn from the other side. Her hand fell to her side and she stepped back, a satisfied smile making its way to her face.

He for sure had still been in bed. Roxas leaned against the frame of the door, his eyes narrowed, hair a mess, and clothes void. Kairi's face heated up as she stared at the teen that stood there in his boxers, quickly raising a hand to cover her vision. "For the love of- Put something on."

"What're you doing here?" He ignored her previous statement, staring at her for a few moments before moving back to allow her in.

Kairi didn't bother replying, if he didn't know why she was here, than well by damned he was going to find out the hard way. She grabbed his arm, dragging him up the stairs while he struggled to close the door. Pulling the stumbling blond up into his room, she shoved him on to the bed before straddling his lap.

"Truth or dare," Kairi held him by the collar of his shirt, his eyes wide—What the _hell_ was she doing?

"T-truth." Roxas's heart was hammering in his chest, a nervous sweat breaking out across his brow as he stared into her lavender eyes, (they're purple right?...blue? He's staring into her coloured eyeballs k?) his gut in knots.

"No, pick dare."

"I don't think that's how this game works."

She scoffed, pushing on his chest and pinning him to the bed, "Truth then. Do you love me?" The confusion was evident on his face as he stared up at her, his hands resting against her knees on either side of him. Kairi was cursing herself over and over again, so much for being subtle about all this.

The extended silence was killing her, she didn't know what was going through his mind as his eyes swept over her face—and for a second to her chest, but she had sinking feeling it wasn't going to be what she wanted to hear. Raising a hand to his hair, she tug on a strand that was misplaced, waiting for his response.

"Of course I lov-"

"No," She interrupted, dropping her hand and leaning over him a bit more, hands against his chest. "Do you _love_ me?" Kairi hated herself for how shaky her voice was becoming, she wanted some kind of guidelines for how this was supposed to play out. She didn't even know what she was doing anymore.

He continued to stare at her, his mouth slightly open in what she assumed to be shock. Why wasn't he answering her yet? How long had it been?

"Kairi, you're crushing my lungs."

"Answer me, dammit." Before she knew what had happened, she found herself on her back, pinned against his bed. Her arms stung from his grasp, narrowing her eyes as she glared up at him. She tried to roll back on top, instead failing and continuing her struggling. "Get. Off."

"I love you." Her body froze for a few moments before she felt a hand against her cheek, her arms were free, and she took the chance to wrap them around his neck before pulling him closer. She wanted to get to his lips, instead though, he pressed his lips against her forehead, causing her grip to slacken slightly. "I've always loved you." Her chest ached; feeling like her entire body was going to go into a massive twitching fit.

'Truth or dare?" She was staring at his chest, refraining herself from going straight for his neck as was. She didn't know what she was feeling, she was so happy to be _here_ with him, but it felt wrong. Part of her knew that it wouldn't last.

"Isn't it my tur-"

"Truth or dare, Roxas." She nuzzled into his neck and buried her face against his chest.

"Tru-"

"I dare you to love me."

She felt his lips against her neck, causing her to let out an involuntary moan before getting a firm grasp on his hair. As soon as their eyes met his lips met hers. Her nerves were shot—she quickly bit down on his bottom lip causing him to pull away.

She saw then, her best friend, as someone completely different; and she wasn't so sure if she liked it. His eyes were narrowed, probably from where she had bit him, and he stared, waiting for her to give him the okay to continue.

Her mouth was dry and her throat tight as quickly made her decision. "I didn't sleep with Seifer."

She felt like her heart was going to split into two as he slowly processed her words, the look in his eyes making her want to run home, hide under the sofa, and never see the light of day again. He slowly got off of her before standing in front of the bed, watching with confusion. "What do you mean?"

Kairi slowly sat up, her eyes burning; what was she doing, why did she have to ruin it? The guilt in her chest remained still as she stared back at him. She wasn't going to cry here. Not now, and definitely not in front of him. "I lied."

He let his gaze fall, watching the floor as he tried to straighten out what was going on in his mind. She hated this. She hated herself. She hated Seifer for ever agreeing to help her. But more than anything, right then, she hated the look in his eyes as he looked up at her again. "So all of that… It didn't happen."

"No, I was mad about Naminé."

"Get out, Kairi." She cringed; his tone was icy, laced with disgust. And it made her sick. Why had she even come here?

"Roxas," Her voice cracked, using every ounce of resolve she had to keep from bursting into tears. "I'm sorry."

"Get out, Kairi."

"No." She jumped to her feet, quickly getting in his face as she jabbed a finger into his chest, "This is all _your_ fault." He raised an arm, shoving her away so there was space between them once more. She didn't relent, "No! This is your fault, all of it!"

"Kairi, get out of here." He stepped forward, grabbing her arm and roughly pulling her towards the door.

She turned into him, pushing and sending them both to the floor. She quickly crawled on top of him, pinning his chest down once more. "You _love_ me? Then what the hell is all this Roxas? Why have you been teasing me for _so_ many years? God I've always been here. Always and I just wanted—" She stopped, trying to regain control of her emotions before continuing; she couldn't cry. "I just want you."

Roxas stared up at her for a few moments before shoving her off. He quickly got to his feet before grabbing her and slinging her over his shoulder. Kairi hammered on the back of his chest, screaming the entire way down the stairs—though she wasn't stupid enough to flail on the way down, sending them both down to breaking their necks. As he reached the door, he sat her down before opening it.

Kairi looked at him, pleading silently for him to magically become less angry. She couldn't deal with this, she couldn't stand here and have him ignore her. "Roxas, _please_. I'm so sorry. Ju-" He grabbed her arm again, shoving her out onto the porch.

"Go fuck yourself, Kairi. I'm done." The door was slammed in her face.

And then, Kairi felt, it was okay for her to cry.

**If I can't be happy, neither can Kairi :c **

**In all seriousness, I just, I went at this and this is how it came out so. Brr. Anyway, c: Hope you guys enjoy an update on this! (OmgzitwaslikethreepagesonWordIwassoproudofmyself. ) Review if you'd like c; I'll try to update again fairly soon.**

**Extended Author's Note: **

**It was really hard getting back into this. I don't know if I've kept Kairi consistent with how she's been. I guess she's kind of cracked, but I'm not really sure. What do you guys think? Is this out of character? Has coming back to this killed our bitchy Kairi!? D: I just didn't know what to do with these two. You guys want them together, but I say no! This is the end of this fi-/shot No but really. **

**I've did next to zero writing in the past... Year. I guess. I don't know how long its been. But- here it is. So. Frrreeeerrr. I'm sorry.**


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